How do you encourage others to achieve their potential?

Don't believe the hype! I can't be anything I want to be; I will not be winning any Olympic gold medals in gymnastics. However, with the help of Coach Sommers at Gymnastic Bodies @gymnasticbodies or the team at Sports Fitness Advisor, I have a chance at making some seemingly incredible gymnastic moves given the time and effort. A coach goes a long way to bring specific encouragement, but what does it look like for those that we live with, work with, or bump into each day in the line for coffee?

This goes deeper than encouraging your buddy to down the entire Solo cup in one gulp. Encouragement is in short supply, and it is needed now more than ever. The FaceBook craze of tagging a friend to do 22 days of pushups to bring awareness to the loss of 22 veterans a day due to suicide is a recent indicator of the epidemic. 

Do you count yourself among those strong silent types that are not much for words? Expecting your kids to be at your bedside to hear your last words and the first time they hear "I love you, and I'm proud of you," may be a losing bet. You are going to get a bigger bang for the buck telling them now and being conscious of hearing their "thank-you."

Effective encouragement is specific. Telling a co-worker the pitch went "great" leaves plenty of encouragement left on the table. Telling her, "the preparation paid off, the customer fully understood all the elements of the pitch and as a result of her effort, they filed a purchase order," is far more memorable and meaningful than just hearing "great." 

Warning, grasping this concept is like learning that Santa Claus is not real. When you receive a weak encouragement, it doesn't resonate, but when a specific encouragement is delivered, and it received as intended, it will provide courage for the future and help those encouraged to soar. What happened this week, where you can provide specific encouragement?

Going Further: Who gives specific encouragement to you? How have you experienced the difference between general and specific encouragement? What kind of encouragement do you provide? What can you change to start providing specific encouragement? What observations do you have about encouragement?

How do you inspire others?

Humans are social creatures and we have an opportunity every day to build others up or tear them down. I struggle with sadness due to all of the killing that has been happening and my heart breaks for the friends and families directly affected. The acidic political fighting that fills the airwaves does not reflect a country of hope, but one of fear and further division. The Cold War and AIDS were the specters looming over my shoulder growing up. The wars in Iraq and Afghanistan were the shadow for my kids and it looks like terror attacks will be what unsettles the next generation. Is this really the best we can do in the new millennium? 

The Summer Olympics in Rio will no doubt bring great athletic feats for us to marvel. Grace and power revealing what talent, hard work and perseverance can deliver. This will be exciting to see, but it is still presented through a glowing screen. You, you have an opportunity to engage the world around you and deliver some inspiration. Sing, write, give hugs, buy someone a cup of coffee, visit the prison, wash the widows car, paint, sincerely ask "how are you" and wait for the answer, take the kid on the corner out for some ice cream, make yet another cat video for YouTube, teach a class, start a prayer group, learn a new language to speak to the immigrant neighbor, visit a mosque, dance!

It doesn't require a trip around the world to find someone in need; I am confident, that within 200 yards of you, there is someone that could benefit from interacting with you, today, even right now. Give the gift of attention, it is a precious commodity, and rarity in our current day. It will take courage and vulnerability, and you have that deep inside, give it a chance to erupt through kindness. The world is looking for a glimmer of goodness and a reason to smile; you can be just the person to deliver.

Going Further: Who inspires you? Who can you inspire?

What goal are you proud of achieving?

There are two elements to a goal; the journey and the attainment. The ratio is a bit off, the journey is 98% and the attainment is 2%. Unless you are the 58-year-old that still relives your part in an obscure high school football game everytime the Friday night lights power up; then the ratio is flipped. For the rest of us, the time spent to attain the goal is the preparation and the grind to achieve the degree, the medal or the acknowledgment. Historically, I would characterize my attainment 2%, as very stoic. Great, I won an award, let me take it out of the frame and put it in the file cabinet. Disclaimer: my achievements do not include any Nobel prizes.

But, is that the whole story?

Any achievement is done with supporting help from others and celebrating the 2% allows for a moment to reflect and thank those that helped to make it possible. Remaining silent or downplaying the achievement is selfish and robs others of celebrating their contribution in the pursuit of the goal. This also provides an opportunity to inspire others and cheer them along on their journey. The 2% is important.

Last year my son and I completed a Spartan Sprint obstacle race. I was very nervous going into the race and nearly backed out the night before the race due to fear of injury. Spoiler Alert: it didn't kill me. We finished, not in record time, but we finished. We made some great memories and will be doing another couple Spartan races this year. Celebrating the completion of the race was an opportunity to thank my son for heaving me over obstacles, walls and whatever else was necessary to keep me going. It would have been a missed opportunity to encourage my son if I had merely filed the finisher medal away and never spoke of it again. We both need to be reminded of the glory of achieving a goal. 

Going Further: How do you acknowledge the goals you have achieved? How do you celebrate with those that have helped and sacrificed for you to achieve the goal? What prevents you from fully celebrating? Are there any achieved goals that were not properly acknowledged? What other question should be asked?