How do you experience love?

Fella's back off!
No, your significant other didn't pay me to ask this inquiry. I figured I would make you nervous all on my own and besides, Valentines Day is a long way off. Stop the Google search for flowers or chocolates; this question is really about each of us individually. Author Gary Chapman provided a framework when he listed his five love languages as words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time and physical touch. Perhaps you may need to shoehorn your preference into one of these categories, or you have another, but self-awareness is the key.

If you are convinced that this doesn't apply, then I believe you will lie about other things as well. I may be sexy, but I ain't stupid. There is a chance your true self, has been cauterized by life and your need to relearn who you are. Perhaps a strong personality, growing up, convinced you that you were wrong, and you didn't experience love expressed in a way you could understand. Your preference is not isolated to romantic love, nor is it is not too late to recognize who you are.

The beautiful couple on the silver screen or the perfect family on the small screen established the model of love for many. This model was easy to try on, make our own and never realize the fit was wrong. Our relationships may express love to us in the manner they receive love and unintentionally miss the mark for you and me. Discovering and sharing this preference demands courage and vulnerability. Graciously reminding those in our lives of this fact can transform our romantic, family, friendships and work relationships. Our eyes are opened to see things we previously missed. Be brave and get to know yourself, it will change your life.

Going Further: What are your primary and secondary ways of experiencing love? How long have your close relationships known this about you? Who expresses love for you in a way you receive? What were your relationship models? How have you applied this knowledge and how did it impact your relationships?

What has generosity taught you?

This one requires you to have a writing utensil, get one; I'll wait.....

Documenting our learning is a good thing. The process of putting pen to paper increases the chances of the information sticking longer. Taking a moment to consider all that a topic has taught, gives us the opportunity to poke around in the corners of our experiences and recognize how this influences our thinking and feelings.

Write down five things generosity has taught you? Since we are living life together, I will go first, and this will give you time to get a pen I mentioned above. 

- Empathy: This virtue allows me to try to see the world from another perspective and in some small way, enter it.
- Gratitude: My generosity has cultivated an appreciation for what I have and when I have experienced the generous acts of others the gratitude is further magnified.
- Humility: I have been on the receiving end of much generosity and each time I am reminded that I can't accomplish this life on my own.
- Boldness: I have become more willing to talk about my struggles and needs. Friends have responded with various kinds of generosity; taking the time to call to make a referral or help move a household. If I don't let anyone know I need help, then I don't get it until it has become an emergency or not at all. Additionally, I rob them of an opportunity to help and they later ask "why didn't your ask?" 
- Love: My wife has generously put up with my shenanigans for a long time and graciously continues to love me in spite of my weaknesses.

Now it is your turn. Don't cheat and just scroll away. You have made it this far, so you may as well get the benefit of the exercise. It will be worth the effort, I promise.

Going Further: What opportunity has generosity provided? What generosity lessons have you learned at home, school, work and play? What learning has been a surprise? What other question about generosity must be asked?

YouTube Link: What has generosity taught you?